Earlier today, I tweeted about how much I hate third places that try to create fake intimacy with patrons. I’ve never used this comment thread feature before so let’s try it out!
Beloved lovelies, here are my rules for a great bar:
Either has a TV or doesn’t
Either does fancy drinks or doesn’t
Serves either leveled up snacks or leveled down entrees
Regulars ain't all white dudes
Bar staff ain't all white dudes
Has Wi-Fi
Be fun in all seasons
🔥Happy Hour specials
Has cool merch (merch = a t-shirt, coozies, maybe a crewneck but that’s IT)
Sponsors a beer league team
Owner is either really nice or really mean. No in-between
Does special things for holidays
You never see your exes there
The ratio of locals to tourists is 90%/10%
One cheap shot option (bonus points if the cheap shot is local! (Example: In Chicago, I want Malort shots and I don't want to spend more than $5 for them.)
Mediocre/Terrible social media presence
Doesn't have those cheap-ass "local team" championship banners bought off Amazon like this:
Two questions:
What is your criteria for a “great” bar? Not good, GREAT.
Does this bar exists where you live? If so, share!!!
Not too bright / Not too dark
Really cool chefs snacks
Music that I love
Friendly but not intrusive service
Interesting customers to watch
Temperature. Toasty in winter, refreshing in Summer
Ice cold beer no matter what the temperature
Good selection of wines by the glass
Interesting cocktails
1. Can't be too big but it can too small / Great music / Must be good enough for me to move by it
2. The Whistler.
multiple bathroom stalls!
free popcorn.
yahtzee.
willing to help charge a dead phone.
free taste tests of draft beers.
any replica of the happy crab (must have og employees).
The Native